When we identify ourselves with our skills, our worth risks becoming entirely connected with what with do, and no longer with whom we are innately. This direct identification with the ego-mind leads often to hurt and disappointment because in order to feel accepted and good about ourselves, ego makes us believe that we need to do something in order to be worthy of it first—it effectively pushes us to search for a feeling of fulfillment within the identification of our skill sets and attributes. This search is almost always external, an M.O that requires us to be at the mercy of something outside of ourselves to bring us happiness.
This makes the individual somewhat reject his true self, because even though time and effort spent in an area can help to develop a form of expression, the true self is not in any way, shape or form dependant on its successes or failures to be the light that it is at all times—there is no cause and reaction for the splendor of our true selves, it just is.
When we feel as if we failing at the game of life, we are actually being given the opportunity to draw the curtains around the illusion of who we think we are and give up on the game itself so that we can experience the unconditional—the so called ‘losing’ allows us to remember our natural state and walk away from the need to win in order to feel what we are at all times.
The experience of life within a person is unconditional and it has nothing to do with the external reality that one chooses to lead, so next time ego decides to play his sleazy game of Who is Who, we should attempt to dismiss it with our authenticity and let go of the attachment of how things should or not should be in our minds, honoring who we are regardless of what the desire to be is.
By giving up on the feeling of succeeding in the area of our lives that is consuming us, we let go of that need and free ourselves from its hold, disallowing the feeling to define who we are. By giving up on the need to either lose or win, we show up in the game of life without the mask of our so called identity and allow ourselves to just be.